It's a Learning Experience

Bad sex sucks. And is such a huge waste of time.

We’ve all been there. Not really being in the mood. Only doing it so he would shut the hell up (for those of you in a relationship). And that’s when I asked myself why. Why, do we as women, put up with lousy partners, when men can keep going without a care in the world?

It isn’t difficult to satisfy a man. Men know how to get themselves off and women know how to get men off, but when it comes to satisfying a woman, things can get a little…tricky. Most people have a vague sense that women respond to extended foreplay, and that they're often more orgasmic through methods other than intercourse. But when it comes to experience with specific and varied techniques, or real comfort handling the female body, a lot of males and females are still groping in the dark.

It takes skill to please a woman. Duh, right? However, we can’t put all the blame on the dudes. Women’s bodies can be a bit of a mystery, even to a lot of young women. Consider the fact that 40 percent of college women don't even pleasure themselves.

Think about investing in a vibrator, or maybe a detachable shower head (for those of you lucky enough to live off campus). You also might want to know your roommate’s schedule, so she (or he) doesn’t stumble into an awkward situation.

How are you going to teach somebody to please you, when you don’t know how to do it yourself?

Now, trust me, I understand that that kind of thing isn’t for everybody…but I’m just saying.

Once you learn what makes you happy don’t be afraid to communicate your desires with your man/boo/bootycall. But don’t intimidate him or scare the poor boy off. Have patience. Remember, practice makes perfect.
If it hurts or you feel uncomfortable during the act, tell him to stop and try another position. Never feel pressured to do anything that you don’t want to do.

And also no faking. Faking is like lying and lying is like cheating and when you FAKE AN ORGASM, you are cheating yourself out of the satisfaction that you deserve. FAKING AN ORGASM isn’t going to make him stop whatever he’s doing. It’s just going to make him do whatever annoying thing he is doing even harder. Longer. Leaving less time to vary from the script. So just say no to faking.

College is an amazing opportunity to figure out who you are as an adult woman, free of your parents and high school boyfriend. This can mean anything from pledging to volunteering or changing your taste in partners. Try abstinence for awhile. Read erotic books. (Zane anyone?) Promise yourself that if you choose to have sex, it will be good and good for you, physically and emotionally.

As always, be true to yourself, be safe and wrap it up.